Thomas is at the crossroad.

It is my troubled time when I must say that Thomas has reached the point that he may not be able to continue his fight against this horrible beast called melanoma cancer. For the past month he has taken a turn for the worst. He's been dealing with a lot of pain and his right hip has worsened like the left hip and he no longer can walk at all. He has been in a wheelchair for about the last 6 months and can no longer stand for no more than just to get from his recliner or bed into his wheelchair. This past weekend has been his worst. He got to where he could not tolerate to eat, the smell or even talking about food made him sick. Everything he ate would make him get sick and throw up immediately. He's also lost so much weight.

To bring things to a little more light, the tumor on his cerebrum in the brain has returned and they can no longer pursue any treatment. It is causing pressure on the brain and he has a lot of pain in his neck where it is located. One good side, what ever is going on, he's not had to take his pain medicine for the rest of his body since Saturday, he seems not be be in pain except for this area and it is only occasionally. I'm assuming that the pressure and possible swelling on the brain is deadening the pain throughout his body. He has lost a lot of weight and his body is finally getting to the point I just don't feel he will be able to have the strength to fight much longer.

It breaks my heart and is ripping my soul apart to see him as he is but he's still a wonder and he's still doing the best fight he can. Stacie had to take him back to Blount Memorial Hospital yesterday morning and Dr. McCathren pulled Stacie aside and told her, "you do realize it is close to the end". They made the call to admit him and I don't know at this point if he'll get to home again or not. They did blood work and also another MRI last night and we are now waiting on the results of the MRI on the brain. I also know my Guy, he'll fight to the end. At this point we do not know for sure when his fight may be over.

It has also reached the point where we are trying to find the right words and manner to let Julie who is now 6 yrs old know what it happening with her Daddy. It is so difficult to try to tell her and to know if she truly understands. She knows Daddy is sick and since he's been in the wheelchair she says Daddy is hurt. I feel she does understand more than what we may think and she is another priority in our hearts right now too. Stacie is being a wonder in herself, I know she too is wanting to fall into a thousand pieces but she is maintaining the best she can and is by his side and will be till God makes his call on what will be best for Thomas. I know God is with him and will take him home when it is time. I feel too he's doing his best to make sure Thomas is not in a lot of pain. Thomas told me a few weeks ago he's really not afraid of dying, he said, "I'll get my legs back", so I know too I can rest in heart and soul knowing he will go home to be with our Lord.

We are finally at the time of waiting! Please pray for him and please know we are so thankful for family and friends during this time and I know God will get us through whatever will be. I hope I'm wrong but I also pray he will not suffer.

With love and sincere thanks
Pat